How can I help a child who needs very frequent rewards in order to behave?
Q: I have a child in my class who initially responded well to a target and reward system. He is fine when the rewards are frequent, but when they are given less often he reverts to his original behaviour, so that I have to increase their frequency again.
A: In my experience, if a child becomes 'hooked' on a reward scheme it is because it is the only avenue of definite success that he is enjoying in his life. Most children need to feel the warmth of success and appreciation in other areas. Maybe you need to look at the type of reward this child is receiving. If it is a sticker, star or certificate, for some children these are not enough; they are merely plasters papered over a deep wound. My belief is that if a child is always being helped to be good then a tendency towards 'learnt helplessness' can settle on him. The child loses sight of his own potency as an agent of change. I prefer therefore to negotiate systems whereby a very needy child, if he reaches his agreed targets, can go to help a younger child, the caretaker or the secretary. The secret of success is that he takes another child with him so that he is also building relationships at the same time.
It is relationship building which is the key to weaning a child away from immediate rewards. If people like you and want to be with you this is a greater incentive than a congratulatory piece of paper. So, look carefully at the nature of your target and reward system to see if it is encouraging the social and personal development of this child. Then look in a holistic way at the rest of the child's week to see if that child is receiving good news about himself other than that relating to the target system.
To follow a side issue, there are some children who do very well on these systems and are weaned off with great success, but then - much to the teacher's despair - revert to the original destructive behaviour later. Don't panic; this is quite natural and doesn't mean that your original approach has failed. It probably means that the child has had a crisis in his life and needs the security of falling back on his original system to support him through a difficult period.
Tell a friend
Enter yours and a friends name to send them this page.
